Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Deployment Blues

They have officially set in!  Every time Jesse leaves for more than a few weeks at a time, the first week or so I get what I "fondly" call Deployment Blues.  Kinda like baby blues lol.  Not really a depression, but definitely dont wanna do a damn thing if I dont HAVE to.  Which also means that I've been slacking in the gym department.  I'm determined to go tomorrow though!  And depending on how I'm feeling this afternoon I may go after the older 2 get home from school.  Thankfully the blah feeling doesnt usually last more than a week.  I dont think it helps that the holidays are coming up as well...and thats never easy if you have a loved one over seas.

I know Jesse being gone is effecting Doug too.  He's been VERY emotional the last few days...which once again is totally normal.  He usually comes out of it in a week or two.  It's hard on both of us though until he does.  And of course living with my parents...it's hard on them as well.  Until this point they havent really been around the kids this much.  Yeah we lived with them for 6 months when Jesse got out of the Army after his first 4 years...but there were only two of them then, and they were a lot younger.  So they havent gotten to see Doug in all of his emotional glory before lol. 

I cant help but wonder sometimes if it was the right idea to move here...money or not.  Dont get me wrong, I love my parents and the support they offer....but I know this situation isnt easy on any of us.  We have WAY crowded conditions lol (3 adults and 3 kids living in a 3bd 2 bath house), no one has privacy, it's noisy ALL the time lol.  Which granted the noise I'm used to...but they arent.   Cant help but wonder if we'll make it through this year with our relationship intact (my parents and I lol).  So far so good though.  Yeah there have been a couple bumps but nothing we cant handle.

Either way, I miss my husband.  Having him here for 3 weeks wasnt even close to enough.  It went buy so freaking fast it seemed like he was here for a couple days instead of 21. 

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